| Apparently I suck at life...Im one major fuck up |
[Sunday, February 26, 2006 @ 01:07AM] |
I never seem to have enough time to post entries but I am feeling special on this Saturday night. Maybe it's because it is very late and I am bored. I'm watching the Fifth Element and drinking tea...Lately I don't want to go out with some of my friends and it seems as if they don't want to hang with me either. I love them all like WOAH but it's hard when all my friends are in relationships and I am coming out of bad one. People don't understand how I feel unless they are going through it...I know they try but attention seems to shift to them quite quickly making it hard for me to explain how I am feeling. Apparently I am not a good friend but it's not easy for me at this point in my life and I am having a lot of issues on top of my friends. Some people have stuck by me while others shy away and dont talk or accuse me of doing something. Whatever they can hang with their friends and be bitchy cause in the end this is when I find out who my true friends are and who will stick by me. Do people honestly expect me to bounce back and be perfect again after losing someone that I supposedly could trust and TRULY liked me?? Is it easy?? Am I not good enough to be your friend, or go out with you?? WHAT THE FUCK...people are really good at making me feel like shit...I guess I am sick of sucking up to people to make them unmad at me even when I dont know what I did. So there I said it I FEEL BETTER
Friday was a lot of fun...my girlies made me feel better but for the first time in the past couple of weeks i felt alone. I was surrounded with tons of my friends but I felt like i was sitting alone in the middle of the dancefloor with no one to dance/care/know me! It was upsetting...very upsetting but I am now over it and from this point on I am living my life thinking about the present and not the past. I dont hold grudges, I loathe fake people, I am who I am, If my friends are bitches well screw them I will find someone new, I have no tolerance for people who use people, and guys who screw girls over deserve to rot in hell, I am a cold hearted bitch and Im fine with it, Life isnt easy so if someone is having a problem dont stop being their friend or ignore them, just let them know you are there to listen and be friends, not enemies!
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| New Years was awesome |
[Monday, January 2, 2006 @ 01:31PM] |
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mood |
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music |
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Ben Kweller |
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So lately I have been uber busy and I haven't had any time to even look at my LJ but today it is raining and I am lacking a life until later today. SO HERE I AM!!!I have had the past week off of school/life. It has been so nice to go to bed at 5 AM and wake up between the hours of "I dont give a flying fuck"-"My parents don't give a shit what i do" Yea don't you wish you had the same hours I did???? So XMAS= always fun to hang out with drunk cousins, steal their money in poker, and at the same time get lots and lots of presents!! Hooray for me and my awesomeness. After XMAS New Years came very quickly...like way too quick! Anyway my plans were going to see some friends play in a concert AKA greg with Creatures of Habit and The whole Walut Payback gang...ohhh and by the way I got my permit and lets just say I am a kick ass driver already...so back to my story, I was out driving and I get a call from Jill and Emma saying that we are gonna get dinner before the concert at GREEN BOWL. Exciting right? So I am running late as usual so I skip dinner and meet them at Websters...we hang...we bond...blah blah blah...we go to the concert! I see greg's band play, they rock the house with some 99 red balloons and Little sister. Then =W=P comes on and rock out with some covers... it was awesome but of course! After that Jill and I went up to the front of the stage and did some "head banging" haha and Greg decides to surprise me with the "wrap the arms around my waist" routine...it was nice! So we hit the diner for the New Years countdown and we see a homeless drunk man there. Lets say it was the funniest thing i have seen in a long time...he gets arrested= end of my fun! Then greg has to leave=Im sad...I spent New Years with friends and then we went to Shanas for and awesome SLUMBER PARTY which rocked. We went to bed at 5 AM and we were up at 11 and Jill and I had sexy breakfast at Panera. People probably thought we were stoned or wasted. Anyway i accidently dropped the tray in the garbage can and I apparently "screamed" FUCK! So we fled the scene...my life=awesome
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